{"id":6316,"date":"2019-12-15T11:23:55","date_gmt":"2019-12-15T10:23:55","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/monodes.com\/predaelli\/?p=6316"},"modified":"2019-12-15T11:23:55","modified_gmt":"2019-12-15T10:23:55","slug":"the-7-habits-of-highly-ineffective-programmers-young-coder-medium","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/monodes.com\/predaelli\/2019\/12\/15\/the-7-habits-of-highly-ineffective-programmers-young-coder-medium\/","title":{"rendered":"The 7 Habits of Highly Ineffective Programmers – Young Coder – Medium"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"\"<\/a>Are you committing crimes against code?<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

From: The 7 Habits of Highly Ineffective Programmers – Young Coder – Medium<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n

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The 7 Habits of Highly Ineffective Programmers<\/h1>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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Are you committing crimes against code?<\/h2>\n<\/div>\n
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\"Matthew<\/div>\n<\/div>\n
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Matthew MacDonald<\/a><\/span><\/p>\n
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Dec 5<\/a> \u00b7 4 min read<\/div>\n
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Adapted from Pixabay<\/a><\/figcaption><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n
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I<\/span>t\u2019s always good to refactor old code<\/a>, put modified routines through rigorous tests, and brush up on the latest hot new JavaScript framework. But now it\u2019s time to look at the other side \u2014 at the cowboy coders and corporate clock-punchers who keep alive some of the worst programming practices you\u2019ll ever see. This is a list of the seven worst<\/em> programmer rules. Sadly, you\u2019ll regularly find them at work in the real world.<\/p>\n

0. Keep secrets<\/h1>\n

If you can\u2019t be a 10x programmer, be a 9-lives<\/em> programmer. That\u2019s someone who\u2019s too difficult to fire because they know the secret lore of the company app \u2014 and they don\u2019t share.<\/p>\n

To pull this off, be prepared. Junior devs will ask you questions. You will lead them on intricate guessing games, with occasional dismissive snorts and cryptic comments like \u201cwe\u2019ve obfuscated that.\u201d<\/p>\n

Yes, you could share your knowledge, learn from each other, and grow together. But if the goal is maximum job security with minimum effort, your optimizing function leads here.<\/p>\n

1. If in doubt, add another design pattern<\/a><\/h1>\n

As the greybeards say, \u201cAll problems in computer science can be hidden with an extra layer of indirection.\u201d Bolting on new bridges, adapters, proxies, facades, and factories may not solve any bugs in your code. But they will swallow them up nicely, turning your shortcoming into someone else\u2019s problem.<\/p>\n

Also, an obfuscated bug means you have plausible deniability. Who even knows who\u2019s fault it is?<\/p>\n

2. Worship what\u2019s new<\/h1>\n

To every thing there is a season. If you\u2019re talking JavaScript libraries, that season may last only weeks. But no matter the tech, eventually it\u2019s time to move on to something new.<\/p>\n

New technology gets everyone excited. The old stuff may still work, but overnight it\u2019s an embarrassment. Remember \u201cdoes it still work\u201d is secondary to \u201cdoes it impress anyone at conferences?\u201d<\/p>\n

If you\u2019re clever, you can get paid to write the same software several times over, using different libraries and frameworks each time. And if you\u2019re really nimble, you can jump to a new platform just before you have to reckon with the cost of your own spaghetti code. Constant change = a reasonable chance to outrun your bugs.<\/p>\n

3. Don\u2019t let testing get in the way of more code<\/h1>\n

If you want to be productive, you\u2019ve got to wiggle those digits. Testing is definitely not productive. Do you know what is<\/em> productive? Tool-assisted code generation. Spit it out. You need reams of the stuff, entire sets of data classes autogenerated based on your database schema. Next week you can change the schema and run all the tools again. Now that<\/em> makes for a big commit.<\/p>\n

Testing is a drag on efficiency anyway. Remember, Agile programming means never needing to say you\u2019re sorry.<\/mark><\/p>\n

4. Write once, then don\u2019t touch<\/h1>\n

Code is unpredictable. But when it works, it\u2019s like a delicate snowflake perched carefully atop a mid-game Jenga<\/a> tower. At this point, admire your creation. But don\u2019t risk changing anything.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s worth keeping the Pottery Barn rule of coding in mind. \u201cIf it breaks while someone else is holding it, then it\u2019s their problem anyway.\u201d<\/p>\n

5. If at first you don\u2019t succeed, copy, copy and paste<\/h1>\n

If God (insert your favorite deity here) wanted us to suffer, he wouldn\u2019t have put Ctrl+C on our keyboards. No problem is too hard for the right copy and paste. Your job is to cobble together a combination of keywords that will bring you a tangentially related code snippet of StackOverflow. Bring that home to your codebase, and you\u2019ve got yourself some free code!<\/p>\n

6. Comments are for suckers<\/h1>\n

You wrote it in the code. Why repeat it in the comments? (Only exception: If there\u2019s a feature that\u2019s a bit tricky to implement and rarely used, add a TODO comment and check it off your list.)<\/p>\n

This tactic also helps habit #0.<\/p>\n

7. It\u2019s the end user\u2019s fault<\/h1>\n

That\u2019s what they wanted. No, they didn\u2019t specifically say \u201cconstruct me a 10 by 6 grid of buttons to trigger different commands\u201d (actual example from real company). But they did say all of these commands need to be accessible with one click. You\u2019re a programmer, so you know all about logical inferences.<\/p>\n

If someone questions you, memorize this: Not only is this user interface the best, it\u2019s also the only one possible based on the specs I was given. Don\u2019t even bother to recommend changes \u2014 the client would never agree. Hold on, here\u2019s a new feature request. We\u2019re going to need another button.<\/p>\n

(If this seems like an eighth point, then let me remind you that we do base-0 counting around here. After all, how else would people recognize that we\u2019re Real Programmers<\/strong>\u2122?)<\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n<\/section>\n

\n<\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Are you committing crimes against code? From: The 7 Habits of Highly Ineffective Programmers – Young Coder – Medium<\/p>\n

Read more →<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"link","meta":{"inline_featured_image":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"activitypub_content_warning":"","activitypub_content_visibility":"","activitypub_max_image_attachments":4,"activitypub_interaction_policy_quote":"anyone","activitypub_status":"","footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-6316","post","type-post","status-publish","format-link","hentry","category-senza-categoria","post_format-post-format-link"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6daft-1DS","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":9133,"url":"https:\/\/monodes.com\/predaelli\/2022\/03\/08\/programmers-with-these-3-capabilities-will-be-in-the-highest-demand-by-pen-magnet-mar-2022-level-up-coding\/","url_meta":{"origin":6316,"position":0},"title":"Programmers With These 3 Capabilities Will Be In the Highest Demand | by Pen Magnet | Mar, 2022 | Level Up Coding","author":"Paolo Redaelli","date":"2022-03-08","format":false,"excerpt":"Want to win against AI? 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